Saturday 7 April 2012

Carts

Have spent most of today trying to come to terms with the pretty unreal news that Carts has gone. Haven't figured out how to do that yet, so thought I'd try writing.

Carts was one of a number of faces I saw most Saturdays at rugby. Someone I eagerly shared a few beers with when the chance arose. I doubt I figured high on his frequent numbers list, but whenever we were in the same place at the same time, he'd give me a smile and a handshake and make like I was his oldest friend. Every now and then, if I'd been good, I'd even get a hug.

That was the kind of guy he was. In his eyes and in his company, everyone was a friend. He stepped into a changing room or onto a pitch or into a pub, and brought so much happiness and brightness that it was hard to avoid. He was one of those guys that made you feel ten feet tall to be around.

That's why I thought so much of him. Here was a guy with a wide circle of close friends. A man with talents and wit and warmth. A man who could easily make the minimum of effort with new or fringe people, in the knowledge that his life was fun enough already. But he didn't. Every time I saw him, he treated me like he'd missed me, like it was a pleasure to see me again. He didn't have to. Lord knows I'm awkward enough at times, I take a while to get out of my shell. But Carts didn't care. Carts smiled and chatted with me all the same.

In my eyes, that's huge. It's why I thought he was amazing. I hope he knew.

The news today hit me far harder than I ever could have imagined it would. I'm not sure if writing about it now is the right thing to do. It doesn't feel enough. But it's helping stop the tears from pushing out for a little while. And I don't think the world can ever be full enough of good words for Nathan Carter.

He was one of the best. That he's not here anymore is unfair. But I'll think of him often, and I'm sure once the tears leave me alone, I'll smile about him often too.

I'll miss you Carts. An awful lot of people will. Try and behave up there.

9 comments:

Si Oddy said...

Well said Gav. You echo a lot of my own thoughts in your words.

I know Carts would tell us all to cheer up and remember all the great times, but it is hard not to feel miserable thinking about how many more there should have been.

Matt WJ said...

Heroic Mr. Collins,

Your comment about him making you feel 10ft tall is the one that rings truest with me.

He had an unerring knack to say the right thing at the right time and had presence and confidence to spare...

Anonymous said...

Gav

You've described the great man so well. We'll all miss you so much Carts.

Dave Gregson

Dom Fitchett said...

Thanks Gav. I would struggle to put my thoughts into words at this time, and to do justice to such a lovely guy, but you've nailed it. Carts bought joy to every room he occupied and he will be greatly missed.

Dom Fitchett said...

Thanks Gav. I would struggle to put my thoughts into words at this time, and to do justice to such a lovely guy, but you've nailed it. Carts bought joy to every room he occupied and he will be greatly missed.

MattR said...

I had no idea about the news until I saw a link to this page on facebook. Just absolutely devastating. He was a cracking bloke, for all the reasons that Gav outlines far more eloquently than I ever could. Rest in Peace Nath.
Radders

Anonymous said...

Gav/All,

I'm absolutely stunned, disbelieving and heartbroken to hear the news - someone else said it, Carter was a great man and will be missed dearly. Rest in peace Nath

Vossy

Ash said...

Excellent words mate. Carts was a great bloke, liked by everyone in the club. Devasting news, really is.

Anonymous said...

Hi
My name is Chris and i am Nathan's brother in law. Gav the words you have written here about a great man are so true. He will be missed by all and i hope that the great memories that we all have of him will live on in all of us.
Thanks on behalf of all the family for the kind words from you all.

Chris Tarbuck (Nathan Carter's Brother in Law)